Pam Webb

a writer's journey as a reader

Archive for the category “humor”

19 Nov 2025
7 Comments

BMW Moments


Have you lately experienced any of the following?

a. At the store you see one aisle over that person from (fill in the blank) and want to say “Hi” but forgot their name, so you avoid their aisle and suddenly become interested in something to avoid meeting up with them.

b. You are watching a movie and an actor steps into the scene, you know who they are, and can even recall all the other movies you’ve seen them in, but their name is just out of reach.

c. You’re out in the garage looking for that one tool needed for your project and can’t locate it so you ask if anyone has seen it but right then you’ve lost the actual name of it so you invent a close facsimile like “air blower” for the “leaf blower.”

Any of these ring true for you?

I call them BMW moments. Not to be confused with this:

Not the BMW for now

It’s more like this:

Yeah, definitely

A BMW moment is what I have come to call “Brief Missing Word” moments. It’s where for a nanosecond (or sometimes longer) the name or term, that needed word that is hovering just out of reach cannot be reeled in by those little grey cells (Poirot no doubt had those brain glitches now and then).

In my younger days, about ten plus years ago, I noticed this would happen when I was teaching. I’d merrily be explaining something to my students and suddenly the word I needed evaporated right when I needed it. Most perplexing and vastly irritating.

My hubs eased my concern saying my brain is a computer and like a computer its memory files just needed some defragmentation. Plus being tired no doubt also affected my memory recall.

I bought it and learned to adjust becoming adept at word switching or talking around the missing word through descriptive embellishments.

Once retired, I thought with my mind less filled with lesson planning, grading, evaluation demands, etc. my brain files would have more space. And sleeping in, along with naps, meant being less tired. Right?

Nope, BMW moments were becoming more of a regular feature of my life. So, I naturally think dementia and go to my doctor. He gives the test.

I pass.

His comment is that I shouldn’t worry about those missing word moments unless I start forgetting the names of my children or husband or start putting my car keys in the refrigerator.

Okay. I can accept that. I’m learning to live with those brief missing moments.

Now as soon as I find my keys I can go to that one store so get that thing. Maybe what’s his face has seen my keys.

Posted in creativity, Family, humor, Reflections, stress, Words and tagged , ,
14 Nov 2025
9 Comments

Word Nerds: It’s About Time


tick tock once again changed the clock

I’m almost adjusted to the annual switcheroo, although that shock and surprise of darkness descending at 4:30 pm and waking up at 6 am and thinking it must be the middle of the night because it is so depressingly dark never has become something I’ve grown used to over my lifetime of turning the clocks back one hour in the fall.

Whew-a paragraph of quiet rant. Thank you for allowing that. I do feel better.

With time on my mind, I thought I would dedicate this month’s Word Nerd post to words that reflect time. Ready?

At least one full page!

How are you coping with the time change. You are excused if you are from Hawaii or Arizona.

Posted in America, fall, humor, Reflections, Seasons and tagged , , ,
21 Aug 2025
2 Comments

Bard Bits: Bard in the Park


I’ve experienced Shakespeare plays (one experiences his works, versus watches them—a bit pompous sounding,sorry) in a variety of forms: live on stage (several as an audience member and once as Horatio—very brief); large screen theater; small screen TV; reading, and teaching.

One favorite form is watching a performance in the park, as it is open air, much like a Globe performance. Plus there is the anticipation of lively audience response, the atmosphere being one of shared spaces and camaraderie. And the plays are usually free, at least the one that comes to our fair city is.

Every year in August the Montana company arrives and performs one of Shakespeare’s popular plays in a local park. This year they presented a As You Like It, which is one of Shakespeare’s more popular comedies.

Laughing Out Loud
Bard in the Park

Arriving at the park 40 minutes early I discovered the space already teeming with people, but no matter since I prefer the back for that quick exit to avoid the parking lot tangle.

As the sun drifted behind the trees the temps cooled down and the stage action heated up with runaway sons and daughters, tangled romance, and character arcs. As You Like It is a fun romp and the audience showed its appreciation with plenty of applause and laughter.

Bard in the Park signifies the transition from summer fun to back to school readiness. And Jacques mentions going to school in his famous “All the world’s a stage” soliloquy.

Anyone catch a Shakespeare in the Park performance this summer?

Posted in authors, creativity, humor, Literature, Reflections, Shakespeare, summer and tagged , , , ,
15 Aug 2025
5 Comments

Word Nerds: Yes, that is a word…


A Redbubble poster after my own heart

Your search for that precise descriptor has ended with this batch of discovered words. I must admit I am familiar with “twaddle” and have come across “quidnunc” no doubt due to those old English mystery novels from the forties that I favor.

kyoodle: to bark or yelp noisily or foolishly

gloze: to explain away

twaddle: silly, tedious talk or writing

otiose: serving no practical purpose or result

recondite: relating to, or dealing with something little known or obscure

parlous: full of danger or uncertainty

drouk: to drench

elucubrate: to produce (something) by long and intensive effort

opprobrium: harsh criticism or censure

quidnunc: person who seeks to know all the latest news or gossip

I need to find a way to work “kyoodle” into a conversation.

Posted in everyday expressions, humor, Reflections, Words and tagged , , ,
08 Jul 2025
3 Comments

Bovine is Divine!


Today is Cow Appreciation Day. And I really appreciate our bovine friends. They are noble, as well as humorous. They are inspiring with their ability to placidly spend their days grazing while they are producing milk for the masses.

Cows are so amazing they deserve the Pulitzer Prize for being outstanding contributors in their field.

Next time you quench your thirst with a cold glass of milk, or sprinkle some cheese on your pizza, or dip into that bowl of ice cream be sure to thank a cow.

Posted in Animals, celebrations, humor, Reflections and tagged , ,
07 Jul 2025
4 Comments

Word Nerds: A Little Word with Big Meaning


Quick quiz:

Which three letter word sports the current title of having the most definitions?

A. lie

B. set

C. run

Lie?

Sorry—only two : to tell something that is untrue or to assume a horizontal position.

I’m not lying about not taking word knowledge lying down

Set?

Previously the champ, the Oxford English Dictionary (OED—THE leading dictionary) tagged it with 200 meanings, starting with the expected “put or lay something down” and then running on for another 32 pages with various meaning. Speaking of run—

Run?

Congratulations on this pick as the OED folk have determined that this little word carries a whopping 645 definitions. Impressive, right?

Here’s a sample (taken from RD.com)

When you run a fever, for example, those three letters have a very different meaning than when you run a bath to treat it, or when your bathwater subsequently runs over and drenches your cotton bath runner, forcing you to run out to the store and buy a new one. There, you run up a bill of $85 because besides a rug and some cold medicine, you also need some thread to fix the run in your stockings and some tissue for your runny nose and a carton of milk because you’ve run through your supply at home, and all this makes dread run through your soul because your value-club membership runs out at the end of the month and you’ve already run over your budget on last week’s grocery run when you ran over a nail in the parking lot and now your car won’t even run properly because whatever idiot runs that Walmart apparently lets his custodial staff run amok and you know you’re letting your inner monologue run on and on but, gosh—you’d do things differently if you ran the world. (And breathe). Maybe you should run for office.

And I have run the course on this post. Until next time.

Running out of what else to add to this post
Posted in education, humor, Reflections, teaching, Words and tagged , ,
01 Jun 2025
5 Comments

Of Rabbits and Such


Rabbit. Rabbit.

Okay, got that out of the way.

Apparently one is supposed to say ‘Rabbit, Rabbit” first thing in the first day of the month. Not sure why but hints of good things happening are implied.

It was easy to rabbit trail on this first day of June since it is my favorite month. Why my favorite? Well, thank you for asking.

my inner feelings revealed
  1. School ends in June—referring to most K-12 students. Knowing that summer break’s imminent arrival created an anticipatory exhilaration. And I suppose students felt that way too. I know as a teacher I did.
  2. Flag Day! Not only is this a day to honor our nation’s flag it’s my birthday. Yes, not everyone can claim the truth that people hang the flag out for them on their birthday. That’s what I believed because that’s what my mother told me. Believed it. I still do, actually.
  3. Family birthdays. Winter must have been long because we have a plethora of family birthdays in June.
  4. Summer solstice. Shades of Shakespearean delight as summer officially begins with the solstice. Watch out for fairies and wayward thespians if walking in the forest.
wood you care for a walk?

5. Settling into summer mode. Even though May provides some bodaciously warm days there remains a sense of “just kidding!” since May still tosses in some rain and inclement weather. June seems more confident in providing consistent blue sky days.

6. Birds and blooms. Giving credit to April and May for nudging winter to pack up and leave for a while, June ushers in the season of winged friends and garden flurry. My backyard is a small slice of paradise as hummingbirds and assorted feathered friends cavort amid the feeders and bird baths while I appreciate the lavender, lilies, and other blooming details. And the busyness of bees is a bonus. 🐝

7. Then there is the celebration of the hammock. Reading, lounging, napping—aah, so nice.

tis the season

8. And throw in longer days, longer nights.

Yes, June is a fave for sure.

Any thoughts on June?

Posted in celebrations, humor, Nature, Reflections, summer and tagged , , , ,
24 May 2025
7 Comments

Robin Recall


To prevent any misconceptions I will emphatically state that I do indeed like robins.

Not that is out of the way I have say this: Robins have got to be one of the stupidest birds out there.

Why the vitriol?

Maybe I’m just fed up with this particular batch of red-breasted harbingers of spring.

I don’t mind how they try to nest in our patio rafters every year—at least not too much since when we do allow a nest it’s plenty entertaining watching them raise their noisy brood.

I’m irritated but understanding when they lob their droppings all over my outdoor furniture—when nature calls, and all that.

I must say I get tremendous enjoyment watching them splash around in the birdbath—they are exorbitant extroverts when it comes to bathing.

Getting ready to splash and dash

I do mind one distinct and inexcusable behavior: robin reflection bobbing. Or flap and slap. I’m sure there must be a scientific term for how robins (I have yet to see other birds do this behavior) go for their window reflection endlessly flapping up against it until I shoo them away.

This is is the first year in the thirty years at this address I’ve seen this behavior.

Right—I understand they think it’s another bird and are feeling territorial…

Yet this year they are taking on car windows, the neighbor’s shed window, the office window, the living room window. These aren’t isolated incidents but repeated violations no matter how many times they are chased away.

We even blocked a window so the reflection was covered and the robin still wanted to fight with the window.

I’m doing a call out here—has anyone else noticed their backyard robins being so crazily hostile this year?

My explanation is that this year’s robins are an off batch. They give meaning to the description of being bird-brained.

Maybe there should be a robin recall. Anyone know the number of the department of defective birds? Or did that one get shuttered as well?

Chillax, fella
Posted in birds, humor, Nature, Reflections, Spring and tagged , ,
08 May 2025
8 Comments

Past Tense Teacher


Teacher Appreciation Day happened this week and I silently salute my former colleagues since I am now a teacher in the past tense.

A funny thing happened on the way to the classroom…

I started out my career with an AA in Early Childhood Education. The two year program held in a brand new interactive classroom was an amazing experience. I learned so incredibly much about little tykes and I also learned it would be difficult to make a sustainable living watching other people’s preschoolers since wages were barely above minimum wage. Hmm, that says something about how society values the care and feeding of our children. Let’s move on.

From there I enrolled in the university’s speech therapy program (having somehow been convinced by my dentist and mother to do so because he wanted to include a speech therapist in his practice and my mother probably liked the prestige of her daughter going into the medical field). I transferred out at the end of the year. Less said the better. Let’s move on.

Another university, another program. This time it’s Outdoor Education(officially dubbed Leisure Studies—I know. Outdoor Education is better for the resume). A BA later and an internship helped me understand this too was not a sustainable career since a camp director lives on site meaning time away from family and most camps are seasonal. Let’s move on.

I like to write. I like the outdoors. How about Environmental Writing? This university needed warm bodies for their new MA in the Teaching of Writing? Okay, I’ll switch. This one had possibilities providing I got hired on at a community college. One local CC with no openings. The library is hiring.

Twelve years later, a big move with a family now in tow I apply for the local high school library position. What? I need a teaching certificate to be a school librarian? More school. What? Budget cuts? The school district can afford a certified librarian? Options?

All those different paths helped me become an English teacher. An ECE degree definitely helped with classroom management (preschoolers and teenagers share distinct similarities), teaching outside the classroom when applicable thanks to Outdoor Education, and an MA in the Teaching of Writing absolutely came in handy. All that library time? What better place to apply literary knowledge than in AP English.

I didn’t intend on being a teacher because given my druthers I would have thoroughly relished being a long term librarian. I did appreciate my time in the classroom and do miss it (at times).

So happy Teacher Appreciation Day to those dedicated to educating our youth.

Posted in Americans, education, humor, Libraries, Literature, memories, Reflections, teaching and tagged , , , ,
04 Apr 2025
3 Comments

See (the) Gulls


As retired empty nesters the hubs and I are on the low key retirement plan. No RV or exotic journeys are on the agenda. Doing jigsaw puzzles, reading books, talking walks, backyard birding, and watching a good mystery series are adventurous enough for us. Going Costco and lunch is a big outing for us.

I will confess we will get really crazy now and then and binge three episodes of Dr. Blake pushing our bedtime past 10:30 pm.

Now this might either sound like an extremely boring way to spend what is considered our twilight years or it might be an ideal of retirement life. To each their own, eh?

Three years into retirement and we are in a groove and spontaneity is perhaps not so much on our minds anymore. Staying at home is quite pleasant actually. Why spend money and have to deal with other people? I know—this mindset does limit date ideas when we do decide to go out.

So on the third rainy day when cabin fever was setting in my no-let’s-stay home husband got a glimmer in his eye and suggested going for a drive.

Yes, it was still raining out. But getting out was needed, plus maybe spontaneity has its place. I assented and off we drove.

Truthfully, driving around town in the rain is not that fun although parking the car overlooking the marina proved rather pleasant.

As we sat there gazing at the rain languidly connecting with the bay I laughed as the windows began steaming up, wondering if cars passing by were wondering what we were up to. It’s nice to know that after 40 years of marriage we still can generate heat in a parked car. Admittedly it was all talk and no action.

It is nice that we still have the capacity of great conversation after four plus decades of marriage. The topic at hand was why were there year round seagulls residing at an inland lake. In our thirty or so years living in a town that boasts having an impressively large freshwater lake that has always been on my mind.

So we asked Siri, which I have named Jarvis, after selecting a British voice for my iPhone AI.

Well, they aren’t seagulls. In fact there is no such thing as a seagull. There are only gulls. And some live by the sea.

Sea period. Gull period.

My goodness that stumped us. How do I possibly unlearn a lifetime of calling a bird by the wrong name?

The point of this post is that if we hadn’t veered from our comfortable lifestyle for a bit of spontaneous getaway time we would not have learned a most enlightening fact.

So—take a moment to do something a bit different than usual (a hearty recommendation is to stay safe and sane in your decision) because you just might have an opportunity to learn something worth knowing.

Yes, and the bonus of our outing is realizing that I am my husband’s best gull friend.

Posted in Family, humor, memories, Reflections, romance and tagged , , ,

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